Breathe Into Me
by NellyLove
Summary: *For ExtremeRainbowRaiderPrincess* Song by Red. He ran away from her when she said those certain three words. But after the fact is when he realized he really was in love with her and that he wasn't just using her. Now he must make it right. Randy/OC


**Okay, so, this is a request for a new friendly of mine! lol! Trying Randy again, tell me if ya like! Actually, thanks to this oneshot, i know have a Randy Muse..yep, he's new...Hehe! So, hope y'all ENJOY!**

**please leave a REVIEW because REVIEWS=LOVE! and VOTE on my NEW POLL!**

**R.I.P. Michael Jackson, his memorial was beautiful and hopefully now his family, friends, and fans can all have closure...God bless him, and his family.**

**xoxoxo**

**Angel  
**

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_**Breathe Into Me**_

_**By Red**_

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_**For ExtremeRainbowRaiderPrincess**_

_And this is how it feels when I ignore the words you spoke to me_

_and this is where I lose myself when I keep running away from you_

_and this is who I am when, when I don't know myself anymore_

_and this is what I choose when it's all left up to me_

_Randy's POV_

She had told me she loved me. But I had ignored her and walked away. Like I didn't care about her, like I was only using her for her body. Like my on-screen character would have acted. I am so stupid, such a jackass. I've been so busy with myself and getting what I want that I didn't realize she was actually falling in love with me.

What's worse. I didn't even realize I was falling in love with her. And now I was running away from her, avoiding her. Not that she was around. I didn't want her traveling with me. I told her so, even if it was a lie. I didn't want to commit myself to her like that, or did I?

God, I don't even know who I am anymore. I've turned into a fucking player. I was just playing with her emotions, and it happened that I was playing with my own as well. And now it feels as if I've ripped my own heart out, all because I couldn't admit that I loved her.

But what should I choose. Should I choose to admit that I love her, to her face; or should I just forget about her and ignore this gaping hole in my chest?

_breathe your life into me_

_I can feel you_

_I'm falling, falling faster_

_breathe your life into me_

_I still need you_

_I'm falling, falling _

_breathe into me_

_breathe into me_

Alone. Again. Alone. I always feel so alone since I left her. I just left her standing there. In the doorway of her house. God I'm such a dick. I loved her yet I was torturing myself and making me stay away form her. Well, she probably hated me now anyways.

But she was the only person who can save me. When I was with her I felt alive. And now, I feel dead, lifeless. All because I'm without her and the light that she brings to my world. God, she's my world and I didn't even notice it. Until now, when I didn't have her. Well, they do say 'you don't know a good thing till it's gone' how fucking true....

I sighed as I sat down in one of the chairs in my living room. I remembered sitting in this chair with Kirsten in my lap. Her head on my chest as I kissed her forehead. In fact, I could still feel her in my arms. Even though she wasn't here. God, I wish she was. I miss her, I need her.

I had fallen for her so fast. And now, I was almost regretting it. Almost.

_and this is how it looks when I am standing on the edge_

_and this is how I break apart when I finally hit the ground_

_and this is how it hurts when I pretend I don't feel any pain_

_and this is how I disappear when I throw myself away_

_3 months later..._

She's standing there. What is she doing here? I stare at her, she stares at me. What do I do? How am I supposed to act? How will she act? My mind is exploding with questions. I was about ready to lose it. And then she looked away.

I stared at her open-mouthed. It had been months since I'd last seen her. But we were near her home town of Toledo, Ohio. I stared at her, she was in the hotel lobby. Why? I had no idea. She ran a hand through her long black hair, her hazel eyes avoiding me and where I was standing.

I was shocked when one of my close friends John Hennigan walked up to her. He had said recently that he met a girl, and that they were seeing each other. But it wasn't extremely serious. Well, I guess he was talking about my Kirsten. Not that he knew she was mine. I had never introduced her to any of the guys. Feelign no need to, I didn't know I loved her.

And now she was with him. I had already been standing on this emotional precipice. And now, seeing her kiss John gently sent me over the edge. And I fell. And hit the ground(reality) with a hard thud. But I decided to pretend I didn't feel any pain.

Plus, John was walking her toward me and the rest of the guys. "Hey Randy, this is the girl I was telling you about—Kirsten, this is Randy," he introduced. Not like we needed to be. I nodded with a brief hello and handshake. She was staring at me with her big hazel eyes. "I have to go John. I'll see you later, it was nice meeting you Kirsten," I muttered before disappearing and throwing myself away. Into a depressed wasteland, one that only she could bring me out of.

_breathe your life into me_

_I can feel you_

_I'm falling, falling faster_

_breathe your life into me_

_I still need you_

_I'm falling, falling _

_breathe into me; breathe into me_

_breathe into me; breathe into me_

I didn't come out of my hotel room for days. And after a week of no contact with anyone except for what was necessary at shows, the guys started to worry. It didn't help that John thought bringing Kirsten on the road with him would be a good idea. I saw her everywhere I went. Everywhere. In the locker room, in catering, at ringside before shows. In my dreams, in my mind, everywhere.

But I couldn't have her. Not now when she had moved on, to John. I was dying on the inside, well, my heart was. Almost literally too. And I think she saw it. Whenever we made brief I contact she looked so sad. I really wanted to go apologize to her for how I reacted. But, everyone thought we didn't know each other. But we did. And no one could know that. Only us. We carried along this secret.

This secret that could give me life back. That could give me my feelings, my heart back. I had fallen so fast. And now I need her desperately. If she doesn't come find me and breathe some kind of hope into me, I may just die.

My heart was broken. And she was the only one who could fix it. But I doubted she would.

_breathe your life into me_

_I can feel you _

_I'm falling, falling faster_

_breathe your life into me_

_I still need you _

_I'm falling, falling _

_breathe into me_

_3 weeks later..._

I was sitting alone in my hotel room alone again. Like I did everyday that I wasn't working. Sitting alone, depressed. Just thinking of the times I had shared with her. All of those beautiful, wonderful moments we shared. I thought that with each day that passes the pain would lessen, until there was none left.

God how wrong and naive I was to think that. It just got worse, and I couldn't stop myself from thinking about her, and us. I would give anything to go back in time and change how I reacted. If I could change that then instead of running. I would have kissed her, hungrily, passionately, lovingly. I would have whispered "I love you" between butterfly kisses that I laid all over her body.

A knock interrupted my thoughts. I sighed before calling, "it's open!" I heard the door open, but no footsteps, or greeting. Truthfully, I didn't want anyone to see me like this. Sitting at the foot of the bed, with my back against it's frame. With head in hands, wearing a loose tank top and jeans. I had barely moved for 2 days, except to get into bed, and to the shower.

And then I felt arms wrap around my shoulders, pulling me in to someone. I opened my eyes. It couldn't be, she wasn't, was she? "Kris?" I asked in disbelief. She nodded wordlessly as she kissed my forehead. "How could you let yourself get this bad?" she asked, but I gave no answer. She noticed my silence.

After a few more minutes of me saying nothing she spoke. "Why are you so quiet Randy?" she asked. "Because I don't want to say something that will make you leave, or let go," I sighed, hiding my face in the curve of her neck. She smelt so good, she smelt like life itself.

"I told him," she whispered. I blinked my eyes open, "told who what?" I asked confused. "I told John that we knew each other, that we...dated," she said softly, for lack of a better word. "How did he react?" I asked and before she could respond I added, "like me, did he run away from you? Probably not, John's not heartless like that," I muttered the last bit to herself.

She gasped and pulled me away. I thought she was going to leave, and I didn't get why. But instead she just looked me in the eye. "Randy, you're not heartless. You're a good man that any woman would be happy to have. Even this one," she insisted fiercely. I frowned and shook my head, "You always see the good in people Kirsten. But people aren't always good, they have bad in them," I murmured.

She shook me forcefully and I was a little shocked. I stared at her and noticed she was close to tears. "I would never fall in love with a man who is heartless! And I know there's bad in everyone Randy, trust me, I know. But when I'm with you Randy, I always see the good in you. You've never given me proof of you having a bad side," she whispered, caressing my cheek.

"I ran from you when you told me you loved me! How is that not showing a bad side?" I asked angrily. "You were confused! I can tell! Randy, you don't even have to say it. I can see it in your eyes. You're acting like this-," I cut in. "because I love you," I finished.

She swallowed and didn't move as I leaned in and kissed her hungrily. Passionately. Lovingly. "I love you," I whispered over and over as I peppered her with light kisses. "I love you too Randy," she said as she pulled my lips back to hers. And with that, she brought me back to life.

_breathe your life into me!_

_I'm falling, falling faster_

_breath your life into me!_

_Falling, falling, falling_

_breathe into me; breathe into me_

_breath into me; breath into me..._

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**And thank you Extreme for that oneshot you are writing for me! love you!!! *hugs***


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